I have come to a conclusion. Life is not nearly as difficult as it masquerades to be. I think it's us that make it difficult. We don't take things as they come and look too far to the future rather then living in the moment. I haven't been doing that but in living day to day. I forget about what I really want. Even though I'm not entirely sure of what that is yet. I'm just certain of what I don't want.
My parents have been in California and my sister typically works nights so I've been alone and as much as I want to live alone. It's hard to do when you don't have a real life around the area you grew up. I'm starting to make friends but everyone has different schedules. Needless to say I've been a bump on a log. Sucked into the whole of facebook, not exercising, not even getting dressed unless I have something to do, not going to yoga blah blah blah. It's amazing how having nothing to do can mess up your life/world. There are only so many things you can do alone before it becomes a drag. But I'm gonna change that all today. So what I'm alone. I love living alone, I can do what I want.
That being said, found a great new lounge/bakery/hookah place. It was reasonable and really fun. Now I know one place I'll be spending more time at.
And even more exciting. Have a job interview June 1st in Tampa for a job that would actually be challenging and a step in the right direction. And it has a real salary. I'd be like a real person/grown up!!! And I'd move in with my lovely Jilly- what could be better?
Well that's enough for today, gonna go enjoy the day. Making dinner tonight for the sis-a-licious tonight!
<3
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
we are far too young and clever....
So, today has been a great day! Currently listening to Verdi. If you have not discovered the love that is Verdi. Please do so. Some of the most intensely epic sounding music! Guaranteed to inspire of the lowliest of creatures!
Just got done with like 4 hours of yard work and decided to update this before my next errand with my Pops! It's such a lovely day out- the wind is blowing slightly and it's the type of hotness where sweat just pours out of you. I love it. Call me stupid- but I feel like every time I sweat a lot, the toxins and bad things in my body just sweat out. In my case (vodka tonics from last night)! :]
Since I've updated, life has only kept on the positive track that it's been on. It's kind of frightening because (in my life) typically when life is on such a positive track, there is bound to be a downward spiral to even things out. I always fly high, hit rock bottom, fly high, etc etc etc. There is hardly ever in between and I wouldn't want it any other way. Living day to day really is the way to do it. I feel it minimizes stress and helps you to enjoy living in the moment which I think we are guilty of letting it get away from us. Ok, enough about my philosophies of life.
Ah, there is something that I've missed. Philosophy. I really need to start reading again. If anyone could suggest a certain writer or document, I'd be much obliged. I'm curious to read from any movement, I'm not picky. Being out of school is odd. I feel myself get a little more stupid with each passing day. I need to be constantly learning. Otherwise what is life? I feel it is such a dangerous thing to just exist. Indifference is the breeding ground for a lifeless life. Ah, to me, that is the scariest thing one's life can become. Okay, really now that is quite enough! :]
I know this post like probably most of them will just be a jumbling of my thoughts thrown together in sub-par sentences. I just am loving the life that is unfolding before me, I wish I could say I had more to do with it but it's just one of those things that is happening.
Well, remember that job I applied for in the Everglades? I GOT IT!!!! But, I turned it down. I know I said that for me living day to day is the best way and it is but sometimes you have to make that hard decision. The one is isn't as much fun as you would want your life to be. I turned it down because I already have a job that doesn't do much for my future. Why would I leave my life here to do something that really wouldn't be anything other then fun? Ahhh, it was a really hard move to make but I know it was the right thing to do. With that being said, I've gotten serious about the job hunt with my current degree. I looked into nutrition programs here in Florida and there are really only continuing education programs. No graduate programs or even undergraduate. (Can a person have 2 undergraduate degrees???) I'm so hesitant to go back to school anyways. So maybe this is for the best. And I'm only applying for jobs that would be relatively enjoyable and would be good fits for me and have real salaries. LinkedIn is a great website and tool for job seekers.
This week again has flown by. Hanging out more and more with O.F. He makes me pretty damn happy. It's really good what we've got going on!
Speaking of old friends. I have recently reconnected with a very sweet girl from my past. We were best friends in high school and part of college but as many of these stories go, we were too immature to remain good friends. We had a falling out but now, it's all different. We've started to reconnect and I am more then happy to say that we have regained our friendship and it is no longer a thing of our past. We hung out on Monday, got yogurt and dinner and decided it was safe to take our friendship to the "next level". We spent the whole day together at the beach. It was so much fun. What a great time we had. We hung out with her friend also!
Afterwards, O.F and I grabbed some dinner and had a wonderful time at Urban Flats. What a good fun place.
I'm not going to recap my entire life for the past week but suffice it to say that it's been good and that my Mama had a great Mother's Day.
Life is good...
Smile, it's a way to fool yourself into thinking you're truly happy.
<3
Just got done with like 4 hours of yard work and decided to update this before my next errand with my Pops! It's such a lovely day out- the wind is blowing slightly and it's the type of hotness where sweat just pours out of you. I love it. Call me stupid- but I feel like every time I sweat a lot, the toxins and bad things in my body just sweat out. In my case (vodka tonics from last night)! :]
Since I've updated, life has only kept on the positive track that it's been on. It's kind of frightening because (in my life) typically when life is on such a positive track, there is bound to be a downward spiral to even things out. I always fly high, hit rock bottom, fly high, etc etc etc. There is hardly ever in between and I wouldn't want it any other way. Living day to day really is the way to do it. I feel it minimizes stress and helps you to enjoy living in the moment which I think we are guilty of letting it get away from us. Ok, enough about my philosophies of life.
Ah, there is something that I've missed. Philosophy. I really need to start reading again. If anyone could suggest a certain writer or document, I'd be much obliged. I'm curious to read from any movement, I'm not picky. Being out of school is odd. I feel myself get a little more stupid with each passing day. I need to be constantly learning. Otherwise what is life? I feel it is such a dangerous thing to just exist. Indifference is the breeding ground for a lifeless life. Ah, to me, that is the scariest thing one's life can become. Okay, really now that is quite enough! :]
I know this post like probably most of them will just be a jumbling of my thoughts thrown together in sub-par sentences. I just am loving the life that is unfolding before me, I wish I could say I had more to do with it but it's just one of those things that is happening.
Well, remember that job I applied for in the Everglades? I GOT IT!!!! But, I turned it down. I know I said that for me living day to day is the best way and it is but sometimes you have to make that hard decision. The one is isn't as much fun as you would want your life to be. I turned it down because I already have a job that doesn't do much for my future. Why would I leave my life here to do something that really wouldn't be anything other then fun? Ahhh, it was a really hard move to make but I know it was the right thing to do. With that being said, I've gotten serious about the job hunt with my current degree. I looked into nutrition programs here in Florida and there are really only continuing education programs. No graduate programs or even undergraduate. (Can a person have 2 undergraduate degrees???) I'm so hesitant to go back to school anyways. So maybe this is for the best. And I'm only applying for jobs that would be relatively enjoyable and would be good fits for me and have real salaries. LinkedIn is a great website and tool for job seekers.
This week again has flown by. Hanging out more and more with O.F. He makes me pretty damn happy. It's really good what we've got going on!
Speaking of old friends. I have recently reconnected with a very sweet girl from my past. We were best friends in high school and part of college but as many of these stories go, we were too immature to remain good friends. We had a falling out but now, it's all different. We've started to reconnect and I am more then happy to say that we have regained our friendship and it is no longer a thing of our past. We hung out on Monday, got yogurt and dinner and decided it was safe to take our friendship to the "next level". We spent the whole day together at the beach. It was so much fun. What a great time we had. We hung out with her friend also!
Afterwards, O.F and I grabbed some dinner and had a wonderful time at Urban Flats. What a good fun place.
I'm not going to recap my entire life for the past week but suffice it to say that it's been good and that my Mama had a great Mother's Day.
Life is good...
Smile, it's a way to fool yourself into thinking you're truly happy.
<3
Sunday, May 2, 2010
back in the swing of living, even though i might not be on the right track
Man, I feel like life has been going at a breakneck speed. I have to say though, that, I don't mind. Things have just been so good. The weather is finally starting to swelter and I couldn't be happier. I'm really starting to live a life that is good and just full of life. I just wish I were more consistent with things sometimes. Like my art, running and just keeping up with chores around the house. But I'm slowly but surely getting there. My next step is to ween myself off the internet. It's amazing how these modern conveniences can become such a life sucker (for lack of a better word)
Last weekend, I went to Tampa to see the love of my life- Jilly. She is such an amazing person, we lesbian gush about each other all the time. We really are 2 peas in a pod and partners in crime. We're like 13 year old little girls sometimes especially when it comes to my crushes and silly boys that are in my life. It's entertaining to say the least. Ok- done gushing.
So went to Tampa, to check out the Jimmy Buffett tailgate shindig. It was really interesting, what an assortment of people. Young, old, hip, surferish, rich, poor and a whole bevy of other commonplace adjectives. People were definitely enjoying life and letting their freak flags fly- I felt at home. We hung our with her beau's cousin. Was excited to see O.F, didn't happen. He passed out. Haha, how endearing, right?
Afterwards, I was a bit tight and we were starving. We went to Macaroni Grille who has THE best Caesar Salad sans dressing. (I never eat dressing except on occassion) I sobered up a bit but apparently not enough to make plans with an old flame of mine who lives in neighboring podunk city. Needless to say I sobered up when we got to her house and he was there. He's a lovely soul, we just don't work. Thank God, we're on the same page though about "our future". Otherwise that night could have been terrible and Jilly likes him a lot too, so it overall a winner. We drove around bar hopped, didn't drink a thing anywhere and just laughed and danced. Then we decided at about 1 am to go to the beach. We ended up not getting all the way down there, we were done. Jilly and I fell asleep in our poor friend's red car. He delivered us safe and sound to Jilly's. We went to sleep because we knew we were getting up early to go paddle boarding.
Missy, Jilly's friend (what's with the "y's" at the end of people's names? The guy friend from last night was Nicky= ahh. these names are all too cutesy) What a cool girl though, really chill and down to earth. I liked her almost immediately. We went to the ocean and did our thing and bonded and then headed over to Crabby Bills for a pina colada. We were in the beachy state of mind. It was great. We all got along so well, which is always nice. We hung out for a bit and then the heavens decided to open up and poor their love on us. After Missy dropped us off, Jilly's flooded bathroom decided that it was time for me to go home and I got to see O.F. I had such a stellar time. We watched Avatar and then sat out in the dark and watched the lighting which was better then any movie. It's so nice to have new friends and have intense times together.
Monday, I honestly can't tell you what I did but I know I had fun. I did have Spanish class which was nice. Oh wait, I do remember, went canoeing down O.F's river behind his house then just chilled on the dock and saw snakes, played a game and contemplated jumping in the water and went 4-wheeling for the first time. It was great.
Tuesday I went down to the Everglades for a job interview. It was beyond amazing. I went to the ocean, chilled with some really cool people that worked at the hotel. They were the exact kind of people that I thought would have been in the Peace Corps. Really chill and down to Earth people. This was after my interview. Had some Miller High Life beers, it's actually written the "Champagne of Beers" on the can. It was pretty ridiculous and I couldn't stop laughing about it. But yeah, met this really cool guy. It was a total legit kind of night. It was good to meet such a cool person on my trip down here. Did some hiking and had the most amazing veggie burger ever. EVER. It consisted of potatoes, lentils, barley, mushrooms, lima beans and peas.
Left Wednesday morning to come home. The rest of Wednesday and Thursday were really chill. Friday was good, had work and then went to celebrate a good friend's birthday. It was soo good to see them! Had a good time. However, at around 1:30 am, I get a text from mi madre saying, you know you work at 8am, right? Long story short, I thought I was working at 5 pm. I hurried my cute little butt home. Went to work on Saturday. After, headed to a O'Charleys for some cheap margaritas. It was a good night, we chilled on the porch and drank margaritas and had a humongous Caesar salad. Our waiter was super cool too which made the night even better.
Today was a great day, went to a Yoga intentions class. It really opened up my eyes to what I want to do with my life. It was really amazing. Opened my eyes to what I want out of my life and to the interconnectivity of all living things in the world. It was very Pandora (Avatar) of the class.
Tomorrow I will be calling UCF. I have decided to pursue a nutrition degree, so we'll see where that goes.
Remember to love one another. If one living thing is unhappy, then no one can truly be happy.
<3
So go out and enjoy your lives!!!!
Last weekend, I went to Tampa to see the love of my life- Jilly. She is such an amazing person, we lesbian gush about each other all the time. We really are 2 peas in a pod and partners in crime. We're like 13 year old little girls sometimes especially when it comes to my crushes and silly boys that are in my life. It's entertaining to say the least. Ok- done gushing.
So went to Tampa, to check out the Jimmy Buffett tailgate shindig. It was really interesting, what an assortment of people. Young, old, hip, surferish, rich, poor and a whole bevy of other commonplace adjectives. People were definitely enjoying life and letting their freak flags fly- I felt at home. We hung our with her beau's cousin. Was excited to see O.F, didn't happen. He passed out. Haha, how endearing, right?
Afterwards, I was a bit tight and we were starving. We went to Macaroni Grille who has THE best Caesar Salad sans dressing. (I never eat dressing except on occassion) I sobered up a bit but apparently not enough to make plans with an old flame of mine who lives in neighboring podunk city. Needless to say I sobered up when we got to her house and he was there. He's a lovely soul, we just don't work. Thank God, we're on the same page though about "our future". Otherwise that night could have been terrible and Jilly likes him a lot too, so it overall a winner. We drove around bar hopped, didn't drink a thing anywhere and just laughed and danced. Then we decided at about 1 am to go to the beach. We ended up not getting all the way down there, we were done. Jilly and I fell asleep in our poor friend's red car. He delivered us safe and sound to Jilly's. We went to sleep because we knew we were getting up early to go paddle boarding.
Missy, Jilly's friend (what's with the "y's" at the end of people's names? The guy friend from last night was Nicky= ahh. these names are all too cutesy) What a cool girl though, really chill and down to earth. I liked her almost immediately. We went to the ocean and did our thing and bonded and then headed over to Crabby Bills for a pina colada. We were in the beachy state of mind. It was great. We all got along so well, which is always nice. We hung out for a bit and then the heavens decided to open up and poor their love on us. After Missy dropped us off, Jilly's flooded bathroom decided that it was time for me to go home and I got to see O.F. I had such a stellar time. We watched Avatar and then sat out in the dark and watched the lighting which was better then any movie. It's so nice to have new friends and have intense times together.
Monday, I honestly can't tell you what I did but I know I had fun. I did have Spanish class which was nice. Oh wait, I do remember, went canoeing down O.F's river behind his house then just chilled on the dock and saw snakes, played a game and contemplated jumping in the water and went 4-wheeling for the first time. It was great.
Tuesday I went down to the Everglades for a job interview. It was beyond amazing. I went to the ocean, chilled with some really cool people that worked at the hotel. They were the exact kind of people that I thought would have been in the Peace Corps. Really chill and down to Earth people. This was after my interview. Had some Miller High Life beers, it's actually written the "Champagne of Beers" on the can. It was pretty ridiculous and I couldn't stop laughing about it. But yeah, met this really cool guy. It was a total legit kind of night. It was good to meet such a cool person on my trip down here. Did some hiking and had the most amazing veggie burger ever. EVER. It consisted of potatoes, lentils, barley, mushrooms, lima beans and peas.
Left Wednesday morning to come home. The rest of Wednesday and Thursday were really chill. Friday was good, had work and then went to celebrate a good friend's birthday. It was soo good to see them! Had a good time. However, at around 1:30 am, I get a text from mi madre saying, you know you work at 8am, right? Long story short, I thought I was working at 5 pm. I hurried my cute little butt home. Went to work on Saturday. After, headed to a O'Charleys for some cheap margaritas. It was a good night, we chilled on the porch and drank margaritas and had a humongous Caesar salad. Our waiter was super cool too which made the night even better.
Today was a great day, went to a Yoga intentions class. It really opened up my eyes to what I want to do with my life. It was really amazing. Opened my eyes to what I want out of my life and to the interconnectivity of all living things in the world. It was very Pandora (Avatar) of the class.
Tomorrow I will be calling UCF. I have decided to pursue a nutrition degree, so we'll see where that goes.
Remember to love one another. If one living thing is unhappy, then no one can truly be happy.
<3
So go out and enjoy your lives!!!!
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