Merry Christmas, I hope this holiday season has been all you've wanted it to be. A lot of times when I come to a certain conclusions and I stop "searching" for whatever it is that I'm searching for. It comes and find me. It never ceases to amaze me though. Every time I think I have a handle on what's going on in my life, life has other plans. I wouldn't really want it any other way though. To think that I or anyone else ever thinks themselves "smart" enough to figure out life really just makes us vain.
That being said, I was so lazy today, I didn't get out of my p.js until well after dinner BUT I changed after that and went for an epic run. The weather here has become freezing again. In the 30's. Yes, I am turning into one of those crazy runner people. i have decided with the new year that I will be a runner for realsies. I will run even more frequently and for longer distances. Today it went up to a little past 3 miles. And in these conditions, that's pretty phenomenal. I just had a lot of time to think about things today. And I'm going to start doing things rather then just talk about them. This new year couldn't come at a better frame of mind/time of my life. I'm always overly-sentimental and thoughtful during the holiday season. It's impossible for me to not be. I just feel it all. I think of all that I have, of all I have had and about what goes on in the world. I feel so helpless when I think of things that I can't change but I try to not be upset because I do what I can. And I'm eliminating drama from my life. I have no room for it in my life. I am lucky and blessed in the way that the cards fell in my life, so I refuse to put up with others' drama. For me, life is not as difficult or tricky as people pretend it to be. And I'm glad that, that is my perspective.
I'm also going to start volunteering more frequently. Not just around the holiday seasons. But during the rest of the year when we all forget about goodwill towards others. I want to help in our country. It's absolutely disgusting that we help so many other places when there are still people in our "glorious" country that are suffering the same as those in other countries. Only when we have reached the highest plateau that we can reach, should we help others. It's not that I think we should say screw other places. I mean, I do truly have a bleeding heart but it's so haughty to not help ourselves first. What makes us qualified to help others before our own? I don't know, just some things I've been thinking about lately. I mean, I think everyone should be guaranteed the basic rights of life. But, unfortunately, we don't live in a world like that. :[ And I hurt that I can't change that. Enough ranting. I see both sides of this argument so it doesn't make for a particularly convincing/interesting paragraph.
This holiday season has been so good. I was feeling like a Charlie Brown. But, all of sudden, after a late night drive like 2 weeks ago, it all changed. And now, I am sad to see it go. I've also been really inspired by frugality of people that I have been reading about people who live off of less then half of what they make. They give the rest to charities. If they can live that way, I can too. And once I start having a real salary, it'll be even easier and will make me feel better about what I'm putting out into the universe. But this year has been even more special because I was home after being away for last Christmas. I am just so lucky to be home, have the family and friends that I have in my life. I'm also glad that commercialism did not take over my life. Granted, I don't make enough to have bought into it but, regardless, I didn't do it. And I'm still taking the FTCE in January, so that will hopefully bring me closer to a real job. Who knows? A lot of things are up in the air right now. I'll have to sit tight until things materialize.
These past 2 weeks have been something else which is why I haven't really be updating. I met someone 2 weeks ago. It's been a whirlwind and has added to my already existing happiness. Not to throw a platitude in here but... We are 2 peas in a pod and that's all I'm gonna say about that. I'm going to stop being so talky about certain things. Maybe, this is growing up? Maybe it's not. Maybe I'm just being weird. Regardless, that's all I have to say about that. Not to quote Forrest Gump.
So, things are good. Life is great. I'm on the right track. <3 Going back to Charlie Brown now.
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